writings

I purchase many notebooks, pads, moleskines and journals with every intention to jot down my thoughts and ideas. It never really works out that way with me. I end up writing through about 10-20 pages and toss it to the side. I love writing on paper, but after awhile my writing becomes completely illegible. I prefer to type on the computer because of this issue, but I feel it’s a little impersonal.

I’d broken down different books to represent different aspects of my life. Currently I have an idea, random thoughts, work related, and one that contains writings about one person only. I’m very inconsistent with my writings. Some months I’ll write day after day, while others I’ll write once or twice.

I’ve had people tell me that I can write when I try, and that’s a problem. I don’t want to try to write something meaningful. It’s how I am in almost every aspect of my life. I want to just be, and let things happen. Putting forth the effort is putting myself out there. Maybe for the potential of doing something great, or maybe I’ll get hurt in the process.

I write down things on the PC and erase them, or I’ll ponder over a phrase or a word and then just delete it all because it all seems ridiculous. I do want to write more than just a ramble, but after 5 minutes of writing, my brain refuses to continue on a serious path.

Maybe I’ll let it all out, maybe I’ll see where I go from here.